Written by Dan Hopper

I obviously wasn’t going to allow Simpsons Movie week to slip by without doing some kind of Top 10 list, but because I wouldn’t be able to do a favorite episodes / jokes / characters list without deliberating for nine more years and making a list of fifty, I’ve decided to take a look at some of the funniest, most touching, and most memorable endings in the history of the show that I’ve spent more hours of my life watching than I have sleeping.

10. You Only Move Twice (Season 8)
The Hank Scorpio / James Bond parody remains a favorite episode of many, despite being perhaps the strangest episode in the show’s history to that point. The ending, in which Homer receives the gift of the hapless Denver Broncos (instead of the Dallas Cowboys) from his villainous but gracious former employer is a fittingly bizarre cap on the story, made funnier still by the fact that the mysteriously motivated Broncos went on to win back-to-back Superbowls in the years right after the Simpsons jab.

9. Mom And Pop Art (Season 10)
At some point around Season 9, the show developed an inxplicable fascination for absurd, sideways punchlines to lead into the credits, often at the expense of an episode’s worth of humanity or meaning, but the episode in which Homer accidentally becomes an artist, one of the best newer episodes (it’s now 8 years old, but that’s still how I perceive the seasons) was a delightful exception. After failing at all intentional attempts at art, Homer manages to flood Springfield and make it into a mini-Venice, making the townspeople proud and Milhouse less embarrassed for wearing flood pants, and the episode fades out with Homer and Marge lovingly embracing on their rooftop to the song “Arrivederci Roma.”

8. The Otto Show (Season 3)
This rare Otto-centric tale from Season Three is about as good as the side character-based episodes get; the writers develop Otto, they squeeze pretty much every joke out of him they can, then they conclude the episode with a renewed appreciation for the ordinarily minor character, as the admiring Principal Skinner monologues into the sunset, “Yes, hail to the bus driver? bus driver man.” It’s a cute little exploration of how even the most mundane roleplayers in our lives – school bus drivers, regular bartenders, sea captains, etc. – are sometimes unexpectedly irreplacable.

7. Home Sweet Home-Diddily-Dum-Doodily (Season 7)
In the dramatic conclusion to the frustratingly amusing Child Welfare episode, Homer and Marge rescue Bart and Lisa from a Ned Flanders baptism (and Maggie from a symbolic baptism into the Flanders family), then the four walk off together, confident in their shared imperfections, with Homer laughing at the old paint cans in Flanders’ garage with the pointless insult, “Ha ha, Old Painty-Can Ned!” Not only a terrific new take on the old “we’re a crazy family, but we’re family” idea, but it also perfectly sums up the “no faults whatsoever but you still want to hate him” character of Ned Flanders.

6. Lisa’s First Word (Season 4)
The hubbub surrounding the show bringing in Elizabeth Taylor to deliver Maggie’s first word sort of overshadowed the episode’s independently touching ending; after a full flashback documenting Marge and Homer’s problems handling baby Bart and Lisa, as well as both children only referring to Homer by his first name, Homer tucks Maggie in and secretly confides, “The sooner kids talk, the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word,” after which Maggie manages to formulate the word, “Daddy,” delivered to an empty room, before she falls back asleep. It’s cute enough to make you want to push that first baby lamb out of the way.

5. Treehouse of Horror IV (Season 5)
The Simpsons has always had a flair for the occassional absurd twist, and while the device became trite and lost its impact in the later seasons (what wouldn’t after a damn decade?), there is perhaps no more inane – and yet, weirdly satisfying – turn of events than at the end of the fourth Halloween special, when the entire Simpsons family of vampires converges on Lisa, then they all stop, turn to the camera, and shout “Happy Halloween, everybody!” and the show fades to credits with everyone Lu Lu Lu’ing a tune from “Charlie Brown Christmas.” On any other show, it might have seemed like a cop-out, but in retrospect, can you think of any other way to end a story about vampires? Coast Guard?

4. Duffless (Season 4)
The reason I have such trouble fully embracing episodes like “Homer’s Phobia” and the Frank Grimes episode is because the character of Homer, while fluctuatingly stupid, lazy, and prone to anger, was never really a fundamentally ‘bad’ person. This fact is never more clearly illustrated than in the episode when Homer gives up drinking for thirty days, then when the thirty days are up, he rushes back to Moe’s out of habit but has second thoughts, and the episode ends with Homer and Marge riding a bike together and duetting “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head.” It’s impressive enough when a show like “The Office” makes people believe that two fake human beings are perfect for one another, but when an animated show can do that?? Groin-grabbingly transcendent.

3. Lisa’s Wedding (Season 6)
The majority of Lisa’s future episode is just a series of (hilarious) gags one after the other, usually involving supporting characters and their terrible future selves. The ending, however, is a complete sucker punch; after being ashamed of her family in front of her future fiancee and struggling to withstand their constant, grating quirks, Lisa ultimately realizes how important her family, for better or for worse, is to her life. The episode returns to the present and fades out on Lisa walking away with Homer, listening with genuine loving enthusiasm at her dad’s stories of eating fudge and riding the teacups.

2. Bart Gets An Elephant (Season 5)
There’s nothing especially touching or inspiring or meaningful about the ending to this Season Five gem, it’s just simply one of the funniest gags in the show’s history. When Bart’s elephant enters a wildlife refuge and immediately just starts butting all the other elephants, the refuge director explains to Marge, “Some of them act badly because they’ve had a hard life, or have been mistreated? but, like people, some of them are just jerks. Stop that, Mr. Simpson,” then a pan out reveals Homer butting the director with his head for no reason. Rivals the “No HomerS” ending from “Stonecutters” as the best flat-out punchline in the show’s history.

1. And Maggie Makes Three (Season 6)
Through all of Homer’s on-and-off parenting skills throughout the run of the show (and within even this episode), he is never exposed to be more tender and lovable than at the very end of this flashback episode, which also might be my favorite overall episode of all time. If you manage to make it through the ending without tearing up, after Homer has placed photos of his unconditionally beloved third child over the demotivational plaque at his workstation to make it spell “Do It For Her”, and you’re not in a desert somewhere with no moisture left in your body, then you are a more cold-hearted human being than I ever believed this planet could produce.

All right, now I’m tearing up. More favorite Simpsons endings, anyone? Leave ’em in the comments!